You Can Lead a Person to Rice Cakes But You Can’t Make Her Eat

Today we had a webinar with Rubbermaid to teach people about "The Motivational Secrets to Staying Organized." (We are repeating this free event Wednesday night, January 26, 2011, at 8:00pm Central, 9:00pm Eastern. Click here to register.) One of the questions we got from a participant was about what to do about her mother's clutter problems.

We always talk about how getting organized is a lot like losing weight, for so many reasons, and we mentioned during the webinar that you can't make someone get organized any more than you can make her go on a diet. A person has to be ready to make that kind of personal change in his or her life.

For this participant I recommended that she have frank conversations with her mother to gauge her willingness to change, expressing her concerns in a logical way, while finding out what her mother's definition of successful uncluttering would look like if she is willing. Also I encouraged her to get a 3rd party to help if she is ready to do some sorting, because working with a family member can be more difficult due to history and emotional entanglements. But overall, unless things go to an extreme degree into health department issues and serious hoarding interventions, it's going to be near impossible to make a grown-up adult do something they don't want to do, especially if you expect the changes to stick long-term.

If you know people whose clutter is causing concerns about their well-being or their financial situations, you can visit the website of the Institute for Challenging Disorganization (formerly known as NSGCD), at www.challengingdisorganization.org. There are some great resources there that can help educate you further.

I really like to point out to people that organizing is not just about tips, products, methods, or books. It's about PERSONAL CHANGE, and it requires more than just "cleaning up." It requires permanent changes in thoughts, habits and behaviors. Otherwise, your spaces "gain all their weight back," so to speak.

Are you trying to lead someone to the rice cakes when they'd rather stick with a BLT sandwich? Share in the comments!

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